Thursday, July 31, 2008

women work?

I saw this sign today and thought it was funny. 

It made me think of my wife. To the banker my wife would have to say "I don't work" which simply means I don't have a job outside the home to bring in a paycheck. Believe me, she works. 

When I have a day off, I try to make sure I do things to give her a break because as a stay at home mommy, her job is never finished. I get to go to work (that I love), have adult conversations, go out to eat with people, be outside, have quiet time and set my own schedule. She sets her daily agenda but has to adjust based on potty training and feeding schedules... 

Then when I get home, I do my best to help too. I don't think that just because I was at "work" all day that I get to relax when I get home, just like it would be wrong for her to relax all day and start doing things when I get home. 

We are a team and teams win or lose together. If she is really needing a break, it is my job to give her one. If I don't participate when I get home then I am selfish. I don't understand the concept that I "work" from 9-5 then I relax while she still does everything until it's time to go to bed. That seems a little unfair. 

My point: I believe bringing in a paycheck is important but so is making sure your spouse has a break. Teams win together and lose together. If my spouse feels like she is losing then we both lose. In marriage we need to be about partnership and sharing the load. 

Thanks to all you mommy's for all you do that we don't see and you will never be recognized for. 

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

slow down

A few weeks I totaled my car. After countless hours on the internet looking all over the state, I found one right next to the church. I had it checked out and bought it. I had Hannah with me one day and she said "Daddy, I like your new car, it's fast!" 

Today, I was going to work and got behind a lady going super slow and it didn't even bother me. I actually didn't even notice that we were crawling at a snails pace because I was so caught up in the scenery. 

I found myself looking at the sky, clouds, trees, grass, the place I wrecked my bike into a fence (another story for another day...) and everything else around. I was going slow enough that I was actually enjoying the journey and not frustrated with what someone else was doing. 

It was in that moment that I decided that I am going to slow down. I am going to go slow enough when I drive to be able to appreciate the scenery. I am going to go slow enough at home to enjoy my family time. I am going to enjoy life instead of rushing thru it. 

My point: Life goes by so fast. Make sure you enjoy the journey and not just focus on the destination. 

I heard someone say that if you want to have a great relationship with Christ, you have to "ruthlessly remove hurry from your life"... that's good stuff right there!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

why i

C3 has been doing a series called "why i". So far we have talked about "why I" smile, doubt and why I trust

This got me thinking about some of the things people do. Why do some people wear the bluetooth everywhere they go. Why do some people only talk about themselves. Why do people drive so fast. Why do they go to the gym and just stand around. Why do people complain about EVERYTHING. Why do they blame their problems on everyone but themselves. Why is popping pills the only option. Why do you say you are in agreement with a decision only to act like a big baby and blame your spouse when you don't like it anymore. 

These are just a few of the things people do that I don't understand. That is "why I" take responsibility for myself. I don't want anyone to think I am not a person of integrity. It absolutely drives me nuts when people say they will do something but never come thru. They say they will help and be a key leader then they never show up but they always have a great excuse. Irresponsible, inconsiderate people are "why I" carry a sock full of nickels...

My point: You are the reason why. Stop blaming your problems on your parents who never hugged you or your spouse who doesn't get off the couch. You can still choose to have a great attitude. Your attitude is YOUR choice. That is "why I" choose to blog and shine some light on this subject. 

Think about what you are going to do then do it. Don't say you will if you won't. 

Thursday, July 24, 2008

moral authority

I heard a great message by my mancrush - Andy Stanley, about "moral authority". He explained that there are positions of authority that we don't necessarily respect. I am sure you have been there. Maybe it was a parent, boss or whoever...

We may listen to them, because we have to, but we don't really respect them. The reason we don't respect them is because they are not consistent. They say one thing and do another or act one way around certain people and totally different at home.

I guess I never put it in those terms but I can now see that is exactly why I didn't agree with some people I worked for or with. They were inconsistent with what they said and what they did. The "public" person was different than the "private" person. I guess the inconsistency made me question if they were being honest / sincere with me.

I totally understand that there are certain people you are different around. I won't let out a loud belch in front of my mom because she would still slap the fire out of me. I am talking more about matters of character and integrity.

As a Pastor, people will ask my advice/opinion based on a title. Before I say anything, I make sure what I say is what I do and that it is biblical. If I told someone that they need to tithe while I am not doing the same, I am compromising my moral authority.

If I have made the mistake they are asking me about, I make sure I tell them - I have made the same mistake in the past but I can offer what I have learned from it. I always want to operate with integrity and not compromise my moral authority.

I was blessed the other day when my 12 yr old, Shayna, told me that I am very consistent. If I say it is wrong today, it is wrong tomorrow too. She told me that she expects me to tell her what to do and make sure she understands what will happen if it doesn't get done. I communicate the task and expectations as well as the consequences. She told me that she loves this. It takes away any questions. If she does something I told her not to do she gets punished. It is that simple.

If I didn't follow through with the consequences or never told her what I expect, I am being inconsistent and she will lose respect for me because I am saying one thing and doing another.

My point: be consistent. Do what you say you are going to do. Don't do what you say you won't do - even if no one is looking.

You can click on Andy's pic to go to his messages. You will not be disappointed

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

twitter kills

I started twittering a few months ago. I have noticed that twittering has caused me to slack on my blogging. For my faithful reader (yes I meant it to be singular), I apologize.

I have figured out that by twittering, I have a mini outlet for my totally random thoughts and updates. I guess by twittering it when it happens, I don't see the need to blog about it later.

I will do better. I am going to go back to a minimum of 3 times a week. I can always find something to have a strong opinion about.

My point: not everyone twitters and I need to be sensitive to my non twittering fan (yes singular again). I will get back into my strong random thoughts for you to discuss at the water cooler.

If you don't twitter yet, you can check it out here. Let me know if you do twitter so I can follow you.

Friday, July 11, 2008


Can you imagine being so good or bad at something that they named it after you. 

When you make a bad shot in golf, you can take a "mulligan". That basically means you don't have to score the bad shot and you can play another one. I wonder why they call it a "mulligan". 

I am sure I can research it but I thought it would be better to come up with my own story, here it is: a guy named Billy Mulligan (that's him in the picture) stunk so bad that he had to hit too many shots to count. Since they could never keep track of all the shots he really took, they just scored the good ones. Thus, every time a person he was playing with hit a bad shot, he would say "I am going to take a mulligan" and re-hit. 

Now to my main thought. What would be named after you? If I said "don't pull a Chris" - what would that mean. What would I be insinuating, would it be good or bad. What about if I wanted to give you a compliment and said "that was such a Hannah thing to do". 

Do I want you to "go give 'em a Gary". I am not sure what that would mean. What do you think it would mean. Insert your own name and try to think what other people would say. 

My point: you are going to be remembered for something, you get to decide if it is good or bad. Are you living the life you want to be remembered for. Does your word mean anything. Does your name make people cringe or smile.

I know when we were choosing names for my daughters, we would say one and wait on the reaction from the other one. We were basically trying to think of all the people with that name and decided if we liked them or not... you did it too!!!

My goal is to make "Gary" one of the most popular, well respected names out there. What!? It could happen... 

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

make some one smile

As I was walking into the bank today, I held the door for an elderly gentleman. He looked at me with a surprised smile and said "thanks son, you just made my day!"

That made me feel good to hear but then I started thinking and analyzing his excitement. He is either a very grateful person or people just don't do kind, considerate things anymore. 

If something as simple as opening the door for someone will make their day, imagine what letting a car in when there is a lot of traffic would do. What would happen if we started doing nice things just to "make some one's day"? 

Can you predict what someone would do if you paid for their coffee. I am sure they would think "what's your motive?" or "what kind of freak are you?" - those reactions are kind of sad. I think it is important to be kind and considerate to others. Especially if we call ourselves Christians. 

My point: something simple can make some one's day - you can do something simple. Go out and intentionally look for something nice to do. Even if you don't get the same reaction I got, you will feel good about yourself. Stop being so wrapped up in yourself and start doing something for other people. 

Let me know what kind of response you get. Now go make some one smile - do it - really, get going!!!

Sunday, July 6, 2008

guilty until proven innocent

I was traveling home in a mini-van with 126k miles on it. It was me, my wife, 2 sleeping babies, and a dog. This yahoo was riding my butt so as soon as the 2 lanes changed to 3 lanes, I got in the far right lane. 

This dude blew right by me like I was standing still. We even commented that he was toast because there was a cop at the bottom of the hill. We saw the cop standing there waving his hands and we thought "ha ha, you are busted"... Not so fast

The cop pointed at ME and motioned for me to pull over. I thought you gotta be kidding me. Deni said she looked at the speedometer and it was not over 70. The cop asked me if I knew why he pulled me over and I said "I have no idea"... he said he clocked me doing 88 in a 65. I said this "sir, I have 2 sleeping kids and we are not in any hurry, and I don't think this van could even do 88" - he said it was and proceeded to write me a ticket. 

This sucks. I have been pulled over for speeding before and I ALWAYS admit it when I am guilty. This time, I really wasn't doing it and it is going to be my word against his. Guess who is gonna win that one???

I honestly believe he got the speed of the car that blew past me and tagged me with his speed. How do you go to court and argue that one. Every person that gets pulled over says they are innocent. The judge hears every excuse and sob story there is. What do you do when you REALLY are innocent. What about the "until proven guilty" part?

My point: I am a person that admits when I mess up. I will own it instead of making excuses. The people that know me - knows that if I say I did it, I did it, but if I say I didn't, then I didn't. I have enough integrity and they know my word is good. 

I wish the judge would just say "oh, you didn't do it - dismissed" and bang the gavel. I really don't see that happening. 

If you know of a way to get out of this one, let me know. If I did it, I would admit it.