Sunday, November 25, 2012

someone to blame

I heard a great quote that says "the search for someone to blame is always successful".

That is so simple, deep and sad all at the same time.

The simplicity of the statement is because it is clearly true. We don't have to look very hard or far to find someone else to blame. When we lose our temper - it is the fault of the person who did something we didn't like.

It is deep because it is really hard to explain why we do this. It is too deep to understand what goes on inside of us to make us feel like shifting the blame to someone else is the best thing to do.

It is sad because we feel justified when we blame. It is sad that we are not mature enough to admit our wrongs or take control our emotions. It is sad that we put so much time into justifying our actions instead of trying to change the flaws in us.

My point: I hate when people throw others under the bus. Blaming someone else for something that is clearly your responsibility is a weak way to handle things.

I think blaming someone else is an excuse for your failure. If you want to be successful at something be successful at honesty. If the only thing you are successful at is finding someone else to blame - are you really successful? Or is that someone else's fault too...

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

licensed to care

The past several months have been interesting to say the least.

Shayna turned 16 so we did the driving school thing then the hours of driving then came time for the test.

Because she didn't pass the maneuverability part the first 2 times, we got to know this gentleman pretty well.

The first visit was all business. The second time was a little more conversation and less formal. By the 3rd visit, Sgt Straight was telling us all about his family vacations, his sore knee, his financial status, his love for a good beer and lots of other very interesting things.

He opened up because we got him talking about himself. We cared enough to ask him questions about him.

My point: a lot of people care so much about themselves that they don't have the ability to care about others. I challenge myself to allow others to talk more about themselves then I do about me. I am trying to model for my children that it is so much more interesting and fun to get to hear other peoples stories.

This is the same guy that cussed the 2nd time she hit the cone and on this day he was cheering and cheezing her on!

We already know our story, lets hear theirs.

She just got her license to drive, but I hope she always keeps her license to care...

Sunday, November 18, 2012

oh deer

How many people will take their time to research and find a car then take a whole day to take a 14 hour round trip to pick up that car then sleep in his car for an hour so he doesn't kill himself then in the process of all this - wreck his car? The answer is 1.

I am humbled by friends but can't even tell you how honored I am by friends who go above and beyond.

On the way back from NC, picking up my new (to me) car, I was passing my friend and I saw a deer jump in front of him. He hit it and then it rolled into my lane so I finished it off.

That's right, I was driving my new car home and hit a deer. That is the least of my worries. I was more concerned about his safety then for our cars.

I hate that his kindness and generosity ended in his car getting damaged.

My point: sometimes kindness doesn't end the way we think it will. Things don't always go as planned. Doing a favor may take longer, may cause you to not get as much done, may cost more, may be inconvenient but you do it because that's what a friend does. You do whatever you need to do.

My friend may have hit a deer but sent a loud and clear message of friendship.

Do you have a friend like that? Are YOU a friend like that...

Friday, November 16, 2012

went to the gym but didn't workout

I went to the gym but didn't workout.

On my way to the gym I got on a phone call and figured it would only take a few minutes. I was wrong. It took a little longer and as I was on that call I got a voicemail and had to call that person back when I was done.

It turned out that I sat in my car in front of the gym and talked the entire time I set aside to workout. So when I was finally done talking, I walked into the gym, took a shower and left...

As I went in, I told the girl working the counter what I was doing and she laughed.

My point: sometimes things come up and we have to make adjustments. I was totally fine with taking advantage of my gym membership just to use their locker room facilities.

I told a few people this story and they said they would have drove all the way home to get ready because they would've been too embarrassed.

What would you have done???

Thursday, November 8, 2012

but she did...

8 Years a miracle child was born.

We were told she would probably not make it full term but she did.

We were told she would not live for more than an hour or so if she did make it full term but she did.

Megan was named "Megan" because we found a meaning that said "strong & able". From the time we knew her heart did not develop right, we started praying that she was strong and able.

I believe she lived 4 days because we surrounded her with nothing but love. We had our families come in and LOVE LOVE LOVE. Then we locked ourselves in a room and showed this child nothing but love. Even tho her heart wasn't working correctly, she hung on 4 days because she was being loved. She was strong and able.

Then 4 days later, she crossed over into eternity and now she knows Love personally. God is Love. She is with our Savior and we will see her again someday.

My point: every opportunity is an opportunity to grow. We are so blessed to call Megan our daughter and because of her I am now stronger and more able. A lot of great things have come from my experience with this little girl. I am still learning and using my pain to help others.

I remember getting so upset that it still hurts so bad - it has been 8 years, shouldn't it hurt less? A friend of mine said "It hurts so bad because you love so deep". I am forever grateful for those words. Now I am comforted by the fact that it still hurts.

Many thought a child with so many physical problems couldn't make a difference in this world but she did...

I love you little girl

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

don't complain

If you have an opportunity to share your opinion but don't - then you can't complain.

Today is about exercising your right to be heard as an American. Regardless what box you check on the ballot, you need to check one of them. Regardless which side of the aisle you agree with, you should take full advantage of letting your vote be counted. 

Today is one of the great days in our country. It is a day that many lives have fought and died for by battling for our freedom to have our voice heard. We have an opportunity to cast a ballot to choose the most powerful position in the world and to not take advantage of it is kinda sad. 

My point: It drives me nuts when people complain but offer nothing to promote change. If you don't like the way things are but do nothing about it - don't complain. If you let your voice be heard and it doesn't turn out the way you want - deal with it because at least you did your part but so did others. 

No matter what happens - today's results are not going to surprise God. He is still on the throne and He is still God. 

Go vote - it's an honor and your right. 

Saturday, November 3, 2012


Today I am in Michigan with my best friend and my daughter. THEY are speaking at the Michigan youth convention: Love Revolution.

I say THEY because Konan, one of the best speakers I have ever heard is sharing the stage for a few minutes with Shayna.

This man connects the Word of God with practical everyday life in a way that you can't help but be moved to change. No matter how many times I hear the same stories - they are still funny. That's just a gift.

Konan is giving part of his session to my daughter to share her heart and passion. She is only going to support one of his main points but she will be on stage with a great man of God.

I believe God is giving this young lady a platform to be a change agent for her generation. With that platform comes tremendous responsibility. She has to guard it because it can be gone as fast as it came.

My point: Everyone needs someone to believe in them. As a parent of course I believe in my children but it is a humbling honor when someone else sees in them what God wants to accomplish in them and gives them opportunities to achieve their passion.

Shayna shared what she will communicate and I already cried. That's just the first time today and I am sure many more are on the way.

When the opportunity was given to her, I said: Shayna I want to say this is a once in a lifetime opportunity but I think for you this is just the FIRST of many opportunities.

Where are the tissues...

Thursday, November 1, 2012

success or failure

Shayna (my 16 yr old daughter) took the maneuverability part of the drivers test. She CRUSHED it...

When I say she crushed it, I mean she crushed the orange cone which means she didn't pass the maneuverability part of the test - but  she did pass the character test.

She was very frustrated that she tried something and didn't succeed at it but as we discussed the situation it became very obvious that the attitude and perspective she took about it was nothing short of a total success.

I framed it this way: I now get to drive you to work, I get to practice with you again, I get to drive to the BMV to take the test again and to me that is awesome because it means I get to spend more time with her. Once she gets her license - she won't "need" me to chauffeur her around and I will not have those little pockets of time that are becoming more and more rare the older she gets.

My point: her attitude and outlook on "failing" was a lesson in character and that is a test she passed with flying colors. The perceived failure means I get some quality time with my oldest daughter. To me those are both successes.

Side note: she literally crushed the cone. She hit that sucker so hard the instructor cussed - now that's just funny.

Failure? I think not. This has been a successful day!