I am going to pause from my marathon lessons to pay respect to my baby girl.Megan Renae was born on Nov 8th 2004 and died Nov 12th 2004. Here is a picture of her in her favorite place, her mommy's arms.
Megan was a miracle. We were told that if she were born alive, she would not live longer than a couple hours. Along with other birth defects, she had a very serious heart defect. When Megan was born we found out that she had a lot more wrong than they originally even thought. She was a miracle because she ended up living 4 days.
The doctors told us that we needed to get our family members in and out - say hello and goodbye. I can't even begin to tell you how hard this was. I wish I could've taken all the pain instead of watching them in pain. After our families were gone, Deni and I locked ourselves in a room with Megan. Her heart nearly quit several but she just wasn't ready to go. I guess she wanted to stick around with mommy and daddy for a while longer.
I remember taking her over to the window everyday and telling her about what I see. I would tell her about all the things going on outside. It was our special trip from the bed all the way over to the window (about 6 ft.) We had big plans for the next day, we were going to take a walk down the hall and see the fish tank. Unfortunately we never made that trip.
We had all kinds of names picked out when we found out it was a baby girl. We decided on Megan because it meant "strong and able". Megan was definitely strong and able.
I remember holding my baby girl and telling her that "you are broke and daddy can't fix you". Talk about feeling helpless.
My point: sometimes life flat out stinks. I choose to celebrate my daughters life and allow it to make me a better person. I am a better human being because of Megan Renae.
"I love you little girl"
6 comments:
Gary,
Check out this video. This couple went through something close to you guys. This video tears me up everytime I watch, but also makes me appreciate every moment I have with my boy Bryson. Your a dad I would be proud to be like.
http://www.ignitermedia.com/products/iv/singles/570/99-Balloons
Over the last 3 years, we have watched God bring His word "joy comes in the morning" to life in you! We love you guys!
Gary
Seeing you go through the loss of your daughter gave me so much more respect for you. To see you always positive and trusting in God like you did really spoke to me. I would sometimes sit back and wonder if I could have handled the same situation in where close to how you did. If I can echo what josh said, "your a dad I would be proud to be like!"
Thank you all for your words and friendship. I am honored to call you all "friends"
Josh,
That video was awesome. We write a message and release a balloon for Megan every year too. I stand there until I can't see it anymore. It, like her life, is gone too soon. Thanks for telling me about that video.
OKay, I'm crying!
Also loved the video Josh!
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