It was a great reminder that a marriage centered on God makes for a much better marriage. The things we most often argue about are issues that come from our fears. Once we are able to identify those fears we can deal with them.
We had a very brave couple sit in front of everyone and work through an issue that has been going on for quite some time. They changed their focus from getting their own way or making sure their opinion was heard to posturing themselves with an open heart to truly understand the other. They changed the goal to understanding the other persons heart.
When you are in a position to understand, you don't have to get all emotional and defensive. When the other person "feels" understood (not when you "think" you understand them), they are more open to trying to understand you.
Watching this couple be that transparent with everyone staring at them was a life changing experience. It took away everyones excuses: If this couple can talk like that in front of everyone, we should be able to do it in private.
My point: marriage is a journey. Are you being a good journey partner. Would you want to journey with someone like you.
Just when I thought it couldn't get any better, we went to our room and they had personalized cookies - now that is a great retreat! (of course our kids ate them...)
