it's the heart

The motive behind junkless june is to give up things that you struggle with. We are all giving up what everyone else struggles to make it a competition and so we can all join in the suffering...ha

Here's the big thing we junkless participants need to understand: it's the heart behind it that counts. The intent behind this month is to go cold turkey, not to wean or find healthy substitutes. I totally agree that we should find healthy alternatives but this contest was to get rid of the cravings all together. July can be the month we implement the healthy options. 

I have had many questions today. They were all innocent enough and I appreciate the integrity of the questions and the acceptance of the penalties incurred. 

Each time there is a question, I will give my opinion, which is my best interpretation of what I think you were saying, then I will ask the person who put it on the list and a few others. So if you are the one who said "fast food hamburgers" and there is a question about hamburgers, I will ask you and a few others for the heart behind you placing it on the list. 

Here are the questions and clarifications that came up on day one:

//can I eat a hamburger from a restaurant that is not a fast food restaurant?- yes. 

the reason is because the person who said it meant the "fast food" burgers only. The restaurant burgers are different. I think we all know the difference between a McDonald's burger and one from Max & Erma's. 

//is a sugar free mint considered candy?- yes. 

it says "hard candy" on the package. Candy is on the list, so even if it doesn't have sugar, it is candy.

//is a healthy snack with sugar free cool whip, sugar free pudding and fruit considered "sweets" or a "dessert"? - yes. 

cool whip and pudding are "sweets" even if they don't have sugar. If it is a sweet, it is a sweet. Again, the heart is to go cold turkey. I appreciate the healthy alternative but it was a snack that could be classified as a "dessert". 

//can I eat soft tacos from somewhere other than Chipolte? - yes. 

This person struggles with Chipolte soft tacos. The other places are not a temptation for her so she sees no reason to put them on the junk list.

//is tea sweetened with a sugar substitute acceptable? - yes.

This person is only giving up sugar sweetened cold tea. It is for cold tea only. You can have hot tea with sugar or cold tea with a sugar substitute. Again, it is the heart behind why this person put it on the list. 

My point: not everything on the list is "junk" - I get it. The goal is to rid you of temptation and to help develop self discipline. You can find the healthy alternative next month. This month is cold turkey. Once you know you can go without it, you will have more confidence to go with a healthy version. It will no longer have control over you and you can prove that you don't NEED the stuff you thought you couldn't go without. 

I know of at least 5 people who have incurred a penalty. Please report any penalties or questions to my email fowler163@yahoo.com . There is at least $25 in the junk pot up for grabs. 

If you have a question please ask before you do it. You will be penalized for ignorance! As long as we are all playing by the same rules and with the same unquestionable integrity, this will be painfully fun... 

Please don't miss the heart behind this month. Don't be anal about it. If you have to ask, it is probably off limits.  

the list

Tomorrow is June 1st.  Let the games begin... It's only 30 days

Here is the official "junk list". If you have any item on this list, even a sample, even a mistake - you cheated and owe $5.00 to the junk fund. It is all about integrity. If you did it - admit it.

//peanut butter

//chili cheese coney

//garlic bread

//pizza
//*chocolate

//ice cream

//fast food burgers (homemade or restaurant burgers are acceptable)

//soda / pop (even diet)
//coffee (yes it's on here & it does include decaf)
//soft tacos (from Chipolte only)

//sweet tea (cold, sweetened with sugar)

//fried food (all fried food is off limits - these were specifically named)

   french fries

   fried chicken fingers
//sweets (all sweets are off limits - these were specifically named)
donuts
cookies
cake
snack cakes
  cookie dough

//cheese snacks (all cheese cracker/snacks are off limits - these were specifically named)

cheeze its
twisterz

gold fish

//candy (all candy is off limits - these were specifically named)
m&m's
3 musketeers
reese's peanut butter cups

//*chips (if it is made by Frito-lay, it is probably off limits)

potato chips

doritos

funyons

cheetos

*Exceptions: 

Chocolate: if you eat or drink a healthy "protein/nutrition type bar or shake with chocolate in it, that is acceptable. You cannot eat a protein bar to satisfy your "sweets" craving. Again, INTEGRITY is the key!!!

*Chips: pretzels and baked tortilla chips are allowed

If you have any questions or need clarification on any of these items please let me know. I will consult with an impartial panel and make the final ruling. I will not attach the names to the item so you don't know who to be mad at...

There are 25 people taking the challenge so there should be some money to win at the end. The goal is to develop self -discipline and get rid of the junk we shouldn't be eating anyway. 

My point: I am impressed with all of you who decided to take the challenge. If you were too chicken - well WHATEVER!!!

This is going to be painfully fun. Let me know how you are doing and especially when you cheat...

da rules

Here are the guidelines/rules for "junkless June"

The Goal:

To break yourself from things that you eat/drink that isn’t the best for you. They may not be awful, but if you think you can’t go without for 30 days – then maybe you need to. 

I am doing this to gain self-control and possibly shed a few pounds. The heart behind it is to not allow anything to have control over me. If I say “I can’t go without (blank)” then I need to just so it doesn’t have control over me. If you think you can but aren’t willing to try then you may want to pay attention to the truth – YOU CAN’T!!!

The rules:
Each participant will submit up to 3 things that they think will be the hardest to go without for 30 days. Names will not be attached to the item so you won’t know who you want to kill. DO NOT submit things just because you think it will be hard for others. This is not to make it hard for other people, it is to help you develop self-discipline.

The penalties:
 I will compile a list and make any clarifications on items. Once the list is compiled, NO ONE will be allowed to eat anything from the entire list. If you do, you owe a $5.00 penalty. I think the penalty has to hurt. If it were only a quarter or dollar – you may think it is ok to cheat. The penalty has to be painful.

There is a $20 “I am a loser without any self control, so I quit” fee. In other words, if you quit you still owe all the penalty money AND a $20 fee. This is all “honor system” so if you think you may have cheated, YOU DID!!!

The Honor system:
You are responsible, under the “honor system” to report to me fowler163@yahoo.com if/when you cheat. I will keep a running list and blog the results at the end of each week (more if necessary).  You need to email me as you cheat and I can keep a running total of what you owe and will keep everyone updated on the total in the “junk pot”. 

If you have to ask "is this cheating" - it probably is but you can email me for the final call. I will consult with a panel of impartial people and respond to your question. 

The Deadlines:
If you know anyone who would like to participate, please tell them to email me their 3 items by Friday May 30^th so I can have the list posted to my blog by Sat the 31^st.
Please let me know what questions you have before we begin. I will post the list on my blog by May 31^st.

The Rewards:
I am sure it will benefit you physically and mentally. Your emotions are up to you… again, if you think you can’t do it, that is one of the very reasons you should try it.

The winner:
The person who wins (cheats the least amount of times) wins all the penalty money. If there is more than one person that “wins” – they will split the money.

The guilt statement:
I swear, with God as my witness, that I have read and understand every word of this agreement.

By “e-signing this” (leave a comment on this blog), I agree to all the stated terms. 

My point: It is for your own good, you might as well give it a shot. The worst case scenario, you bless someone (me) with some cold hard cash...

self discipline

I didn't realize how tough June is going to be until yesterday. It seemed like everything I ate, drank or craved is going to be on the "junklist".

For me this is not a time to just torture myself. It is all about not allowing things to control me. If I want something so bad that I don't care about the consequences, it is time to cut it off.

If I am willing to eat donuts, candy, fried food and not care that I feel run down & tired or how it is affecting my overall health then I have a problem. I believe it is my responsibility to say "enough is enough" before a doctor has to tell me.

I guess as time passes, the more attention I have to pay to my health. I want to be a good example for my family and I want to be around long enough to see my grand kids.

I see people younger than me having all kinds of health issues. Some of them are unavoidable but I want to rule out the avoidable ones.

My point: June is a month for me to get rid of some not so good habits and form some new ones. It is all about self-discipline. I am making other changes as well. I may not tell people what they are but if you know me well enough, you may notice them.

There is still time to jump on the "junkless June" challenge. Shoot me an email fowler163@yahoo.com

junkless june

I was listening to a radio show the other day and heard a guy say there are certain things you can't really wean off of, you have to go "cold turkey". The one thing he said that hit me was DESSERTS!

As soon as he said that, I thought "there is no way I could do that". Then I thought to myself "self, maybe that is why you NEED to do it"... I hate when I do things like that.

I was sharing my thoughts with a few people and they would tell me that desserts wouldn't be hard but pop / Starbucks / chocolate / pork /chips (whatever would be hard for them) would be tough. I then responded with "then you need to do it". I could see the wheels turning and then they would say things like "I am in" or "what are the rules", "what are the penalties"...

It is surprising how much junk we eat and don't realize how hard it would be to go without it. Because it is so hard, that is why we should do it.

My point: if you are so adamantly opposed to going without something that is probably not good for you anyway - YOU NEED TO GO WITHOUT IT!!!

Here is my challenge to you - leave a comment on this post (I don't like "anonymous" but if that is the only way you will leave a comment - go ahead) and let me know what is the thing/s you would have the hardest time giving up for 30 days.

Anyone who wants to take the "junkless june" challenge will be emailed the guidelines.

question

I love clarifying questions or statements. There is something about having a discussion when someone chimes in with the question, that if answered, will bring clarity to the situation. Often times the clarifying question makes the decision easier. It gets to the root of the issue.

We try to "clarify the win" when we are having a meeting or starting something new. We ask ourselves questions like these:

/ what do we want people to know when they leave here

/ what do we want them to do
/ if they only walk away with ONE thing, what do we want that to be
/ is what we are communicating clear and easy to understand
/ is there a better way to get this information out
/ would I want to attend this event
/ if you were a sandwich, what would you be and why

Asking the right question helps people answer a lot of their own questions. When someone asks for advice or my opinion, I usually ask them a question or two. I want to know if they really want my thoughts or if they just want me to agree with theirs.

There are usually two main reasons why people ask questions.
1. to show you how much they know.
2. to show you how much you don't know.

Don't be one of these people. Ask questions to get information. Ask with the intent to learn and grow. Ask because you really want the answer.

My point: questions are a great way to grow. Don't use them to flex your brain muscle. If you have to ask a question just so you can answer it, there is probably a reason you didn't get asked in the first place - they don't care. Don't ask questions just so you can answer the question you ask.

Can you tell this is a pet peeve...

your opinion is stupid

C3 had some interns come from a college to learn "church planting". The original plan was for them to come in 4 hours during the week then they would be in charge of planning the Sun evening service. It would've given them a real hands on experience to get an idea of some of the work that goes into planting a church.

The plan changed and communication was not clear so it didn't end up being what we or the interns thought it would be. The only time they could come in was Sunday nights. That made it difficult for them to see any "behind the scenes" stuff because we were busy setting up for the service.

The internship has ended and we just got a copy of their summary papers (their opinions). I would have to say that they shined some light on some areas of weakness. It was hard to read but when you can see it thru their eyes, it is their honest opinion. I can't fault someone for being honest. I could just blow it off and say "your opinion is stupid" but I think a better plan is to take the criticism and learn something.

Of course, I don't agree with everything they said. I have to understand their opinion is exactly that - their opinion. I just have to make sure I filter it and keep the truth and throw away the stuff that we can't or don't want to change.

We all have opinions of what a church "should be". We just have to make sure we know who we are and who we are trying to be - then do that.

My point: When you ask for opinions, it is like putting a bullseye on yourself. Don't ask if you don't want to know. Just because you don't like an opinion doesn't mean it is stupid or wrong. Change the things you can and blow off the stuff that is of no value. If you ask for the opinion, be mature enough to listen to both positive & negative.

You could always opt for a sock and some nickels.